Thursday, June 28, 2007

It's Official: Blair's the new Mid-East Peace Envoy

It took 24 hours for the Quartet to sing from the same page, but the job of Middle East Peace Envoy has been accepted by Britain's Tony Blair, the man who took ten years to convert Cool Brittannia to Cruel Brittannia in the view of most Middle Easterners. It remains to be seen whether he waives the rules for conflict resolution in this seething troublespot. Will he deal with Hamas? (Mahmoud Abbas, the West's choice for Palestinian President insists on 'no dialogue with putschists, murderers and terrorists') Will the man who helped quell the troubles in Northern Ireland make any difference in the land of Guns and Moses?

"He's not superman, doesn't have a cape," White House spokesman Tony Snow told reporters.

"He's not designed to be doing that. What he is designed to do is to work as an aggressive facilitator"

Ah, so that's what Blair is meant to be. Bush assured a London tabloid that "Blair ain't my poodle", and now the White House has clarified what kind of cute animal tricks it has in mind.

One of Blair's last meetings as Prime Minister was office with California's musclebound Governator, Arnold Schwarzenegger, who is as close to a superhero as US politics can get. His Austrian father famously was in the SS. The wartime exploits of Gustav Schwarzenegger, a brownshirt and "Chained Dog", have caused critics to hound the Republican politician, who clinked glasses with the ex-Nazi Kurt Waldheim at his own wedding banquet. Arnie has been able to make nice with conciliatory visits to Jerusalem, after these revelations, and even can negotiate family feasts with a bunch of Kennedys (his in-laws). The larger-than-life politician may be able to lend Blair some handy diplomatic catch phrases, ie "Hasta la Vista, Baby..." to replace that one that Ms Condi Rice seems to have worn out: "I'll be back!"
Tony is eagerly changing hats for this new role, says the BBC.

1 comment:

officewag said...

Here's another movie that might be applicable to the situation: "Get Carter." Hoo boy